A Fallen Angel

I wanted to share with you, Dear Readers, the details of an interesting experience I had last month. Something unusual happened to me in the middle of a show that I'd never experienced before.

As a bit of back-story, this past August 31st, my grandfather Larry Bensette ('Pepe' to the family) passed away, at the vibrant young age of 92. He was a pretty amazing man, having lived the last 10 years of his life independently in his own home, driving himself around, playing the odd piano gig, and going on dates with his lady friends. We should all be so lucky, really.

Nonetheless, his death was unexpected. He suffered a fall down exactly 2 steps, breaking a hip. The resulting surgery and therapy ended up being too much for his body to recover from.

I have always felt a deep bond with Pep. We saw so much of him throughout the various stages of my life, and aside from bearing his name as my middle name, I felt that he gave me an awful lot of the musical talent I have. Surely, the style that I play jazz piano is almost exactly his.

Barely one week before his fall, Pep had made the trip to Toronto to see Jersey Boys. It was a special occasion to be sure. My Mom and her two sisters were all there, with their husbands in tow, and it had the air of a real special event for everyone. The show was great that night, and when I met them in the lobby after the show, my mom and two Aunts were singing along to the Four Seasons music being pumped through the speakers, as loud as could be!

As they sang and bopped along, Pep just beamed, ever the proud father and grandfather. Later, over a drink, he asked me many probing questions about the show, especially how the music was played, who played live onstage, where the microphones were positioned, how the sound was mixed, etc... I answered the best I could, marveling at how sharp he was at his age. I felt proud, as I often do when large groups of family come together to see a show of mine, that I was the reason for this reunion and these great memories.

When I heard about his fall and subsequent heart attacks, I grew weary. I tried not to think about his plight as I carried on to do my show night after night, figuring he'd make a recovery. But it was business as usual for me.

Two weeks after the fall, he finally passed away peacefully with my mother there at his side.

I was graciously given Saturday and Sunday September 5th and 6th off from Jersey Boys, and with the extended two-day break for Labour Day, I had four days off in a row. Everyone gathered together in Windsor to attend the funeral proceedings. My brother Chris and his family flew in from Japan, some Aunts, Uncles and cousins flew in from Michigan, Calgary, and Northern BC, and friends and family all came too.

Everyone gathered at his house. It turned out to be a great family reunion, in spite of these sad times. The funeral was touching, the reception heart-warming, the burial beautiful. I sang a few songs in the proceedings, and was glad to do so.

Now, to the point of this blog post:
On September 9th, I was back to work. My body was rested, my brain was sharp, and I was eager to be back at work. I was excited to have a few family members in the house that night too. In my dressing room at the places call I dedicated the show to Pep. Although I had my normal pre-show routine and felt great, the show that night became particularly hard for me.

Although my brain was focused and the lines were exactly right, my voice tired unusually fast that night. I was getting raspy and battling the falsetto from the middle of Act 1 right through to the end of the show. When I began to sing "Fallen Angel", something occurred that has never happened to me before. Tears welled up in my eyes almost immediately. Only seconds later, after singing the first few lines of the song, I simply lost my breath. I mean, I literally could not take a breath. I was completely overwhelmed.

Now, as most of you know, the scene preceding "Fallen Angel" is when Frankie learns that his daughter Francine has died. And during the song, while Frankie sings the words he would say to Francine if she could come back to life, her ghost visits him for a moment.

Well, there I was. Sitting on the bench. Tears in my eyes, without a breath of air, in a tight spotlight on a bare stage with almost 1700 people staring at me. I clearly heard the band continuing to play, I could see the conductor waving her arms on the TV monitor, yet I still couldn't make a sound. It was the strangest thing.

On one hand, it felt like an eternity, and under normal circumstances something like this would make any actor freak out. But surprisingly, I wasn't nervous. I never felt scared or worried. In fact, I felt unusually calm.

I think the silence lasted exactly four bars, or about 12 seconds. Then all of a sudden -- like literally in one millisecond -- I just started singing, as though I had never missed a note, right at the top of the second verse. I finished the song without incident and carried on through the rest of the show -- a bit shell-shocked, but otherwise without a word out of place.

After the show, I was initially disappointed in myself. I'm a perfectionist, so I hate making mistakes, and was embarrassed that I made made such an obvious error. I felt as though I been unprofessional by letting my personal life interfere with the show too much.

Well, upon much reflection, I learned a few things about that night. First, I learned that grieving and mourning are incredibly powerful states of being. Without you even noticing, they can profoundly zap you of your vitality, leaving you emotionally fragile. Second, I discovered just how strongly the act of singing taps into your emotional core. And lastly, although I will never be able to prove it, and as kooky as it may sound, I believe that my Pepe visited me on that bench that night.

Oh, and I'm not embarrassed or disappointed anymore for 'forgetting' to sing those four bars. I've come to the realization that this event was an important life lesson that I was fortunate enough to learn. In that moment, I gained wisdom and clarity; about myself, about the nature of emotion, and the mystery of death. I mean, isn't that the goal of living? To learn? To make progress? To feel, and comprehend and grow?

I won't soon forget this lesson. I have the memory imprinted on my soul now. Forever.

I'm curious - I wonder, did any of you happen to have been in the audience that night? If you were, I would love to hear from you. I know some of you have seen the show many, many times and would notice a moment like this as being unique. And, anyone else who'd like to share some of their thoughts and experiences in relation to this, feel free to do so. I know we often don't talk about these things because it can be a bit uncomfortable... but it could be really neat to share on this topic.

Thanks for listening, everyone.

2 Videos, An Interview, and An Article

Hey Everybody,

I thought I'd re-post some links to 2 Videos, An Interview and An Article, as the title of this post so aptly (and subtly) suggests.

You may have seen/heard all these before, especially if you check out my website regularly... I always post everything in the NEWS section of www.jeffmadden.ca.

Just as a reminder, I update my personal schedule and exciting Jersey Boys Toronto events there regularly, as well as link all the content there too. So, if anybody asks where to see this stuff, just send them to my website.

Enough plugs... The links are below...

Lucy Zilio - 2-minute video: Click Here

Lucy Zilio - 30-second video: CLICK HERE

Spider Jones CFRB Radio Interview with Jeff: SPIDER INTERVIEW

Broadway World.com's 1-year Anniversary Article: BROADWAYWORLD.COM

Some Summer

And now, the understatement of the year: It's been a busy summer for this Jersey Boy.

Before I get into everything, here's some news for you:

* JERSEY BOYS Toronto just celebrated its One-Year Anniversary! More on this story at the bottom.

* JERSEY BOYS Toronto has recently been extended until the end of November! So, get over to www.jerseyboystoronto.com (the link is over on the right) or call Dancap at 416-644-3665 and get your tickets now. With any luck, we'll keep on going and going and going...

* There are 7 NEW VIDEOS on my website for you to check out. (The link is over on the right) If you haven't been over there in a while, do yourself a favour and check those videos out! Go to www.jeffmadden.ca and from the homepage, click "NEWS".There's the "ETALK Daily" video, National Anthem Videos, and 2 videos featuring our new "Sherry" B-Roll footage. My performance schedule is there too, so you can see that I'll be off September 5th-6th and 12th-13th.





OK - hit the rewind button - you want to know what's been keeping us so busy? The rest of this post spells it out for you. And remember, these events are all in addition to the eight (well, six in my case) shows we do every week.

June 7th - My radio interview on the FAN 590AM comes out. Check it out here if you like. It's about eight minutes long. Once you get to the link, click on Audio Archives in the menu on the left, the "Jeff Madden interview" is 6th down of the list. FAN 590AM Interview

June 26th - Four cast members play a round of golf with some lucky winners of a Father's Day Contest sponsored by Jersey Boys and the Toronto Star. I discover that spending five hours in the hot sun before a show is a bad idea.









June 29th - THE DORA AWARDS. I win my award, and all is right with the world. It was a stunning night, one that will always remember. I covered it at length in an earlier blog post, so check it out there.


















Canada Day, July 1st - CHIN PICNIC. Eight cast members kick off the opening ceremonies with an a capella version of O Canada. Check out the CITY TV video here or on my website. CHIN Anthem/Interview VIDEO











July 7th - I do an interview with Mad Dog, the energetic morning host at VIRGIN Radio 99.9FM. He raved about the show on air so much, I hardly got a word in edgewise!

July 8th - The Oakville Beaver article finally gets online. Check it out if you like.
Oakville Beaver Article

July 10th - I do an interview with CKOC, a London Radio station. We talk about the 'gas card' promotion to help get visitors down the 401 and QEW highways to see the show.

July 11th - I get the honour of singing the National Anthem at the Roger's Centre for the CFL's Toronto Argonauts Home Opener. Solo. This was a real thrill, as I am a huge sports fan and have heard countless singers sing the anthem at sporting events.Memories of the day include chatting with the Offensive Line Coach on the field a couple hours before game time, getting a nice handshake from Head Coach Bart Andrus just before I started, and after I finished singing, being surprised by a kiss on the cheek by a notorious 'Kissing Bandit', the Argos' 275-pound Adriano Belli. He kinda scared me a bit, and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Argo Anthem VIDEO



July 17th - I do an Interview for Toronto's freebie Newspaper 'Metro' about my freaking car of all things. Madden's Roadrunner Article We also had an extra rehearsal today.

July 22nd - Interview with Classic Rock Radio Station 103.9FM

July 23rd - A live phone interview with morning host Ralph Benmergui on Jazz FM 91.1

July 30th - The four boys all head off to a Toronto Recording Studio to record the Audio for our new commercial. It's called the "B Roll" and its only to be used on News broadcasts. We spent a couple hours hammering out "Sherry" over and over and over. Nevertheless, it was great fun to gain the experience of being in the recording studio essentially doing what the Four Seasons did.

July 31st - Another rehearsal, this time for the upcoming "Taste of the Danforth" performance.

August 6th - Another rehearsal, this time a Dance clean-up with our choreo-guru Danny Austin.

August 7th - We spend the afternoon filming the Video for our new "B Roll" commercial. We're onstage at the TCA, full costumes, set, lighting etc, only now we are filming shot by shot, 10 seconds here, 20 seconds there, and trying to match the audio that we recorded at the studio the week prior. It was very tiring, but ultimately, a lot of fun. Four hours of hard work for a 2-minute slot.

Aug 8th - I do a live radio interview with Spider Jones on CFRB 1010AM in the middle of one of Toronto's most famous streets, Danforth Avenue. It was about 30 minutes, with people walking by and listening in, and Spider was totally playing the crowd. He exudes such a positive energy and was so jazzed about Jersey Boys. I loved being around that amazing guy.




That night, MLB Pitcher Jeremy Guthrie and some of the Baltimore Orioles staff came to the show, and afterward we all hung out together. This was Jeremy's 3rd time seeing us, and it was a pleasure to spend time with him again. This time he brought more gifts - I got a Oriole Ball Cap, a signed picture and another ball. And, an invite to Batting practice the next day. He's the best.

Aug 9th - I join Quinn and Michael on the field at the Roger's Centre in the morning before the Jays/Orioles Game. For me, this is the best. Baseball was my first love, and here I'm truly living out my boyhood dreams. Chatting with ballplayers, hearing the crack of the bat from the cage, feeling the rush. Afterward, Jeremy hands me a glove and we actually play catch right there on the field behind home plate. It was unbelievable. And to top it off, I meet the Orioles Manager, Pitching coach, and get a tour of their clubhouse before hopping into a cab to take me to the theatre for the show.


After the matinee, we quickly get into a van and head over to the "Taste of the Danforth" for our 10-minute live performance. This was the end of a really long week. With all the extra stuff and the six shows, I was really tired. And to top it off, it was really hot and humid that day. And of course, the medley is all the big hits back to back to back, with no rest for me. I basically swallowed the mic and screamed it out. There was not a lot of nuance. Ah well, the trials of being a Rockstar. It was pretty cool though, seeing hundreds of people gather around the stage, dancing and cheering along.



August 14th - Another Rehearsal, this time with our incredible assistant director West Hyler. We're really tightening things up for our big 1-year anniversary show the following week.

August 19th - The four boys are interviewed for CITY TV's "In The City" segment on the news. It was pretty funny. If you're interested, check out the video. CITY TV Interview



August 20th -
It's Jersey Boys Toronto's 1-Year Anniversary Performance. Everything went great, the crowd was rocking, the cast was primed, and we knocked it out of the park. At the end of the show, Aubrey Dan was given a gift onstage by the TCA Board President, and then introduced Bob Gaudio and Rick Elice to the sold-out crowd. Oh, What A Night, indeed.





Once the show was finished, we mingled with Bob and Rick, took some photos, and then headed to our after-party. It was awesome - a big cake, lots of great food, plenty of drinks to send us all home happy. Bob and Rick couldn't be happier with our show, and that makes me a very happy camper.






August 24th - The cast and crew of Jersey Boys Toronto celebrate the summer that was on a beautiful Toronto Harbour Cruise. It was the perfect way to symbolize all that we've achieved together. To paraphrase myself in the show, 'We got something going here. It took a lot of work, and a whole year. We're not gonna let it come apart!'



PS - Look who's Taking the Wheel?!?!

The Night I Won My DORA Award

I imagine by now, most of you have already heard the news... but in case you haven't:
I won the DORA award for Outstanding Performance by a Male in a Principal Role – Musical!

It is such an honour to be recognized by my peers in this way, and a week later, I'm still kinda of stunned. I have received tonnes of emails and facebook messages from you all wishing me congratulations. Thank you all so much, from the bottom of my heart. It means so much to have the support of friends and family. However, in lieu of sending a hundred individual emails thanking you all and telling you how it went, this blog post is my attempt to do just that.

My lovely wife Christine and I showed up under an umbrella at the Dora-Nominees VIP Reception at the Rosewater Supper Club at about 6pm. It was well attended, with both floors packed with beautiful theatre, dance, and opera people eating, drinking and laughing before the big show. Excitement was definitely in the air.

Christine was looking especially gorgeous, in a fancy black frock and I was wearing my new summery suit. (No, Harry Rosen didn't provide me with the George Clooney-inspired duds as ETalk suggested.) Everybody was dressed to the nines. It was a special night, after all. There were a couple short speeches and then we were asked to walk the few blocks over to the Winter Garden Theatre for the real reason for the season. Luckily, it had stopped raining.

We filed in right at 8pm and were seated down in the third row with the rest of the Dancap people. These were the 30th annual DORA Awards, and were hosted by Jian Ghomeshi of CBC Radio One's flagship arts show "Q". (But perhaps most notably infamous for his interview with actor-turned-Tom Petty-wannabe Billy Bob Thornton a month back.) Jian used to be in the folky-pop a Capella group Moxy Fruvous, back in the day. Remember them? ("Once I was the King of Spain, now I eat humble pie...") I had their tape. I'm dating myself. As a good friend used to say, 'Well if I won't, who will?'

But I digress. Like most awards shows, the host opened with a song - but not just any song - "Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You". My heart started beating really fast. Partly flattered, partly nervous he was going to make fun of it/us/our show. He didn't. It was a nice tribute, which segued into a comedy piece where he walked into the crowd and made fun of Ross Petty, mastermind of the Christmas Pantos (sample lyric: 'God knows why Karen Kain is with you...').

The show moved along nicely with some winners saying how they'd been nominated 5 or 10 times and this was their first win; and others winning for their first nominations. That humbled me instantly. Most winners surprisingly hadn't prepared a speech at all, while others delivered their rehearsed speeches with verve and passion.

It was about 9:30pm by the time JERSEY BOYS' 1st category came up. When Sergio Trujillo didn't win for Best Choreography, my heart sank a bit. I thought, 'Oh no, maybe it's not our night!'. But that feeling quickly disappeared when we won our 2nd and 3rd categories; Des McAnuff won for his brilliant direction, and then JERSEY BOYS won the coveted Audience Choice Award for Best Show.

It must have been 10:30pm when they finally got to my category. Cast mates and fellow nominees Michael Lomenda and Quinn VanAntwerp sat to my immediate left and right. We three shared a nice glance at each other as the presenters came on stage. It was a special moment for me, one that showed our support and respect for each other. (Jeremy was dearly missed on this night, as he remained at home in New York with his very pregnant wife Jenny Lee Stern.)

C. David Johnson and Cynthia Dale (both of "Street Legal" fame) read out the nominees in alphabetical order, and in the pause before "and the Dora goes to..." you could hear a pin drop. I know I was holding my breath. It's interesting - I don't remember looking at the stage when I heard my name being called. I'm still not even sure which presenter said my name. In that moment before my name was called, I went somewhere... it felt like I was dreaming.

But, it was no dream. I did hear my name. And I remember hearing applause, and feeling Michael pat my left arm. I turned to my right and looked at Christine, then hugged her and kissed her. I stood up, and there were my parents, proud as could be. I kissed my Mom and shook my Dad's hand as I made my way out the aisle to go up the stairs to the right of the stage.

Once I crossed to centre stage I began to come back to reality a bit. I heard the applause quite clearly now and felt the bright lights shining in my eyes. Cynthia Dale handed my the beautiful (and heavy) statue - I think I kissed her too, on the cheek - not like Adrian Brody on Halle Berry at the Oscars a few years back - that would have been weird. But enjoyable. For her. Kidding. Uh, moving on.

As I walked to the mic down stage I pulled my speech out of my suit jacket pocket. (I like to be prepared:)) I was really happy with how I delivered my speech, and how well it went over. (If you're interested in reading it, it will appear in its entirety in the following blog post.)


Once finished, I exit into the wings Stage Left and am whisked away to a table where I'm given a bottle of champagne and some congratulations. The first photos of me with MY new DORA are taken. I'm interviewed for something live in front of the camera, but it's all a blur. 'How does it feel? What do you have to say?' 'Uh, duh, um, wow, its great...' You know the routine.

The last category of the night is for Best Musical and somehow we didn't win. The Sound Of Music won despite only having one nominated actor (we had four), and losing best direction and the audience choice award to us. But, honestly - you can't find two shows more different than each other, each appealing to two completely different audiences. Apples and Oranges. Both yummy. And good for you. And fruity. (Hey, maybe they're not that different after all.)

The three-hour show comes to an end and I rejoin my colleagues. Lots of hugs and kisses and congratulations from everyone. Some people tell me how great my speech was, and I'm surprised. I guess it touched some people. I realize now that when delivering it, I was very moved up there. I spoke from the heart about how great an honour it is to do what I do, and how lucky I am to be able to follow my dream. I got choked up a bit, I'm not gonna lie.


OK - Enough with the sappy shit! The night was just beginning! Immediately after the awards, we headed over to the After-Party in style - in a double-decker sight-seeing bus. Since it had recently stopped raining, we sat atop the bus in the open air. It was just perfect. We had a magical ride, floating along Yonge Street with it's lights and billboards, and everyone in great spirits only adding to the excitement.

The After-Party was great - more drinks, eats, photos, and partying. Two floors of fun. Lots more mingling and congratulations and even a surprise visit from my brother Joel, sporting his JERSEY BOYS hat. I guess they thought he was with the show because they let him right in! He gave me the biggest hug. And my agent and friend Kish was there by my side all night long too. He was beaming most of the night. He took a big chance on me when I was just starting out, and I owe him so much. It was really special being surrounded by so many friends and family.

The next day, I found this article online - from Now Magazine. Even the writer Jon Kaplan mentioned that I had one of the better speeches of the evening. Check out his wrap-up if you like. Now Magazine Article If the link doesn't work, go here: http://www.nowtoronto.com/daily/story.cfm?content=170170

I am a lucky man, indeed. It was a night I will not soon forget. The night I won my DORA. My Speech follows. Read it below.
:)

My DORA Acceptance Speech

I've printing my acceptance speech here for a couple of good reasons. One, I've gotten a lot of wonderful feedback on the speech from people who were at the DORAS that night. I figured some of you might want to read it here.

But mostly, I've printed it here to send my thanks out to the Universe again, for this incredible honour that I've received. They give these awards to one person, but, no art is created in a vacuum. Theatre especially is collaborative and interpersonal. I owe so many people so many thanks for helping guide me to the point where I am at right now. So, if your name is mentioned here, I can't thank you enough. It means the world to me.
********

(Pulling my speech out of my suit jacket packet)
Wow, this is crazy. Honestly, it's unbelievable.

(Taking a big breath)
I want to thank TAPA and the DORA Selection Committee for giving me this honour.

(Knowing the clock is ticking on my 90 seconds)
Phew. OK, please bear with me because I have a million people to thank, because, well, there are a million people involved in putting on JERSEY BOYS.

First I want to thank Marshall Brickman and Rick Elice for writing such wonderful words to speak, and Bob Gaudio and Bob Crewe for writing such amazing songs to sing.

And I want to thank Des McAnuff, Ron Melrose and Sergio Trujillo for shaping this masterpiece for the stage, who, along with Richard Hester, Michael Rafter, and everyone at the Dodgers in New York City entrusted me with this incredibly demanding role, for some absurd reason.

Thank you to Tara Rubin and Merri Sugarman, along with Sherry Dayton and Michael Walters for not casting, I don't know, Zac Efron or something. (audience laughs)

And my amazing agent Kish for your continued ... (I get choked up, part 1)... belief in me and support. It means so much...

(Collecting myself, hurriedly)
I must thank West Hyler, Danny Austin and Liz Baird for busting my ass every minute of every hour of every day of rehearsal. You let me find my own way through this material, allowing me to shape my own version of "Frankie".

Thank you to our awesome stage managers Cindy, Zeph and Mel, our awesome and dedicated crew, and the best band anywhere - you guys make us all look and sound great up there.

Most of all, I want to thank Jeremy Kushnier, Michael Lomenda and Quinn VanAntwerp, and the entire cast of JERSEY BOYS for being the best cast anyone could hope for.

Thank you to Aubrey Dan and everyone at Dancap for having the brains, and lets face it, the balls to bring this show to the Toronto market at this time. Way to go!

Finally, (I get choked up, part 2) I wanna thank my Mom and Dad sitting right down here and my brothers Chris and Joel for your never-ending support... and lastly ...

*(The Get-Off-The-Stage Music starts to play - it's soft, and pretty, and believe it or not, it's 'Can't Take My Eyes Off of You' played on keyboard)*

(Ad Libbing)
Oh - this music is perfect for this part! (audience laughs)

(Calmly carrying on over the perfect musical underscore)
To my wife, Christine... (audience laughs)... you have made several huge sacrifices to allow me to follow my dream ... (I get choked up, part 3) and I can't begin to thank you enough. I love you so much.

(Growing brazen and Ad Libbing some more)
Look, I'm just a regular guy with a Science Degree who had a passion for performing. So, for all you Science students out there who want to get into show business (holding up my Dora) stick to it, you've still got a chance! (audience laughs)

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

*******
Who I Forgot To Thank:

I wish I had remembered to thank three very important singing teachers who have helped me enormously over the past 15 years. Andrew Seok, Carol Forte and Katie Agresta have taught me how to properly use my voice, enabling me to achieve the limits of my talent. I literally could not do this role without them.

Time Wouldn't Allow Me To Thank:

- Joseph Leo Bwarie, my first 'Frankie', for showing me the way and passing along some tricks of the trade
- My reading partners at my auditions in Toronto and New York City - all wonderful actors;
- My accompanist at my first auditions, Noreen Waibel;
- The musical mentors I've had in my life, including Paul Sportelli, Ryan DeSouza, and numerous piano teachers, trumpet teachers, band leaders in Etobicoke and Dartmouth;
- The acting mentors I've had in my life (whether they knew they were mentoring me or not) including literally dozens of Shaw Festival Ensemble actors and directors too numerous to mention - you have no idea how influential you were to my development;
- The crew at Hart House Theatre and all my friends at U of T in UC Follies who first put the idea of making this a career in my head, and gave me the fertile training ground I needed to develop.